As a male sexual abuse survivor so wisely said on Oprah today:
“Coping isn’t the same as healing.”
If properly cared for, the wounds from our traumas can eventually heal, though we are left with the scars. They remind us of where we’ve come from, and survived. Evidence of victory.
It is interesting that when you combine the words “healthy” and “self”, you are given the edict to heal thyself: HEALTHYSELF!
All of us develop coping mechanisms in order to deal with tragedies that are overwhelming to us. “Coping”, though surviving, isn’t truly “living”.
We can be grateful that our body-psyche came to our rescue in the past, and when we have the proper resources within and around us, and the timing is right, we can take the next courageous step towards healing.
Let go….”Feel it to heal it”, as they say. The only way is through, not above, below or around.
Remember, all of OUR emotions are VALID to OUR experience of a situation. Tears are a salve (literally, not just figuratively), an acknowledgement and affirmation of our deepest, most vulnerable Self. Own your experiences and emotions, and then release them from your sense of personal identity. They are what make you uniquely you, but they are not YOU. Integration is key.
You may be worn, but you are NOT broken.
YOU are still whole, beautiful and loved.